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but, rebutt

From:     blp
Category: Art
Date:     26 May 2008
Time:     09:36 AM


There's so much of this built into the design and function of the equipment that it's hard for me to
identify any sexism in it, except on the part of God maybe (big issues with his mother apparently).
I mean 'Women as receptacles for semen'? That's generally how it works isn't it? 

Maybe the problem *comes* down to the vexed relationship within sex between purpose (beyond the act)
and pleasure. In terms of procreation, the man has to come and the woman has to be the 'receptacle'
for his coming, give or take a few awkward and unreliable medical procedures. But actually, most sex
is conducted for pleasure, so you could argue that, when having recreational sex, it's hypocritical
to stick with a model of the act that's actually designed for a utilitarian purpose beyond the act
and that, by the by, affords the man more pleasure. 

Still, it's the way everyone seems to know. 

Before you even get to the marginalisation of female ejaculation, there' s the marginalisation of
the female orgasm. Again, anatomy seems highly culpable. Not sure if it'll be possible to get a
definitive answer to this, but aren't I right in thinking that the vaginal orgasm is a largely
discredited idea? Or, if not, then that the G-spot you refer to, which is commonly said to be a
myth, is not positioned so as to be stimulated by the penis in ordinary penetrative sex? The problem
is, with or without sexism, the whole area's mysterious and, far from being ignored by a
phallocentric society, hotly debated. 

What's really the culture around this anyway? My impression is, far from not giving a shit, most
men, however neanderthal, take a possibly macho pride in giving pleasure and making women cum. Why
else would women have ever had to lie about it,  fake orgasms etc.? If anything, this brings us
closer to the real problem of sexism in sex: that, in order to preserve a man's fantasy of his own
pleasure bestowing potency, women have felt compelled to lie about it, rather than undermine it by
pointing out that he doesn't even know where the clitoris is, came too fast etc. let alone isn't
able to find the G-spot and make it shoot. 

The only problem with this view is it suggests that women really do have all the info and are simply
withholding it out of politeness. But in our relatively liberated times plenty of women are
perfectly up front about getting what they want through a process of show and tell. Yet how many of
them are explaining the ejaculatory powers of the G-spot to their partners? Well, none in my
admittedly limited experience.  Is it that, despite knowing exactly where their clitorises are and
how they want them touched, when they want you to penetrate and how fast and so on and so on,  male
dominated phallocentric societal conditioning is still alienating them from their G-spot and making
them feel ashamed of their natural desire to squirt? 

Finally, just for the sake of balance, how important is it from the point of view of the woman's
pleasure? Ejaculating and orgasming are all one for a man; there's no release without the squirt.
But, unless I'm even more confused than I thought, women usually come without the squirt and seem
altogether satisfied nonetheless. I'm just curious now, not trying to win debating points: how
pleasurable is female ejaculation? 

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